What’s your job tiTle?

I am a stay-at-home mom and a homemaker. My roles include being a chef, a maid, a teacher, a therapist, and even a taxi driver, just to name a few. About four years ago, my husband and I decided that I would leave my part-time job to fully embrace being a permanent stay-at-home mom. To provide some context, we have a daughter who has hydrocephalus and cerebral palsy as a result of a stroke. I’ll share more about this later.

For many years, I worked diligently, spending 16 years as a waitress at a local restaurant, a job I thoroughly enjoyed due to its fast-paced environment and the generous income it provided. After our daughter received her diagnoses, I transitioned to part-time work as a legal secretary, and now here I am. It goes without saying that I am a hard worker, and adjusting to the role of a “stay-at-home mom” was quite challenging.

You might wonder, “If you were already managing the household while working, why was the transition so difficult?” The answer is straightforward: I was no longer contributing financially to our expenses. This had kept me awake at night, and at times, it still does. Over the past four years, I have focused on personal growth, working hard to recognize that my title of “Mom” holds far more significance than just bringing home a paycheck. Admitting this is a significant step for me; for too long, I undervalued myself and my contributions at home, often feeling inadequate.

I have explored MLM marketing, established my own fitness business, and even started a hat-burning hobby that I truly enjoy. However, these endeavors were merely side hustles to alleviate my feelings of not contributing.

Through extensive self-reflection, countless conversations with my husband—who I’m sure has grown weary of them—and a stack of books I've read, I have come to recognize my value and the contributions I make to our home.

Let me explain further. I genuinely thrive on routine! My days are quite predictable, especially during the school year. I’m up at 5 AM to savor some “me” time. I enjoy a cup of hot tea, read my Bible and devotional, journal to clear my mind of any clutter, and then prepare for my morning workout. After that, the day unfolds. I take a shower, have breakfast, do some therapy with my daughter, do laundry, and manage school activities, except during the summer.

The rhythm continues with trips to the store for weekly groceries, doctor’s appointments, playdates, out-of-town doctor visits, meal prep for lunches and dinners, cleaning the house, walking the dog, playing with the kids, and shuttling them to various sports practices—it just keeps going.

My family delights in home-cooked meals, fresh clothing, a tidy home, clean bed linens, a germ-free bathroom, an organized playroom, unconditional love, and abundant quality time with mom, all thanks to my husband’s support.

One of my most treasured memories is teaching my children how to read. I am their teacher, and I get to share this journey with them. When one of them falls ill, there’s no need to call off work or make arrangements with a sitter or family member; I am right here to care for them.

I enjoy making homemade treats because nutrition is a priority for me. Being able to provide my children with healthy, nutritious meals throughout the day is a significant achievement, as I am here to prepare them.

My husband has a demanding job that requires him to work long hours. Therefore, I take on the responsibility of running errands he can't manage, scheduling appointments for him, and ensuring he returns home in the evening to a tidy house, a warm meal, and fresh clothes. This role is fulfilling, and I see it as my job.

I want to share that for a long time, I downplayed my contributions at home. However, just because I’m not receiving a paycheck doesn’t mean I’m not working hard.

To all the stay-at-home moms and those juggling a 9-to-5 job, I acknowledge your efforts. I recognize your hard work, your exhaustion, and the feeling of never having a moment to yourself. However, keep persevering! Carve out some time for yourself and remember that, regardless of your current situation or job title, you are immensely valued and needed.

-Jess